What makes a man fall completely head over heels in love? Is it timing, sex, cleaning his house, knitting him sweaters, a pretty face or chemistry? What is it? You wanna know? Then keep reading...I know it hurts when someone you’re into isn’t into you...especially if the relationship started out with all kinds of things to surprise you, like coming up with plans and showing you how much he cared…and then he suddenly stopped.
Men don’t need to have sex with you to fall in love. So what DO they need?
First, they need to be attracted to you in some physical way, after seeing you in person or a picture of you. The reason this is important is that you want a guy who can be a life partner to you, not a guy who just wants you as a friend he can’t make a significant other out of...But let me say this: Men who go after the hottest women are usually superficial and might not be very interesting to be with.... Therefore, you may not enjoy being with such men anyway...so leave these men alone, because a real man focus on values, personality, stability, and non-physical traits that can contribute to chemistry...not just how a woman looks.
Truth be told, even if you are both Christians...make sure you are attracted to each other. If a guy is not attracted to you physically, it’s a dead end.
No amount of his involvement in you will make him be the partner you want...oh yes this is raw truth. I am sorry I am not trying to hurt your feelings
I am just trying to help. Once a man is attracted to you, the rest is up for grabs. This means he can then develop an emotional attachment to you, and be primed to fall in love.
Contrary to what a lot of women are doing, which is having sex with a guy based on the assumption sex will win his heart, it is allowing him to experience emotional fulfillment with you that will get him attached enough to have his heart won...that's a lie from the pity of hell.
How Emotional Attachment Begins
He needs to feel the following when he is interacting with you:
1. He enjoys himself when he’s with you.
2. He feels comfortable in being himself.
3. He feels appreciated or admired.
4. He feels understood.
In other words, he needs to feel good to feel safe emotionally. When he feels so good that he feels safe, he will be able to expose his vulnerabilities and thus seek you for emotional fulfillment.
Love Becomes Inevitable
This is almost a guarantee, because men, as opposed to women, for the most part do not obtain emotional bonds easily with everyone in their lives. Women usually get emotional fulfillment from friends and family members, not just from their male partners...
A man’s best friend or closest friend is often his girlfriend or wife. Therefore, falling in love with you is almost the guaranteed result of emotionally attaching to you.
Don’t Fake It just so you can have him!
Now does this mean you’re supposed to jump through hoops to please him? No. You’re supposed to be an expensive pearl with no drama.
Does this mean you’re supposed to keep him entertained with wit and humor? No, not if you’re not naturally witty or humorous just be You...
Does this mean you’re supposed to pour out non stop praises and flatter him all the time? No. That is phony and feels phony...don't do it!
What this means is if the two of you have some things in common and are compatible, there will be a natural flow to your conversation. There will be chemistry. You’ll enjoy the same things together. You’ll both feel so good with each other you’ll be emotionally more connected to one another.
Empower Him
You as the woman also want to feel empowered when you’re with a man, or you wouldn’t want to see him again, right? The same goes for him.
The starting point of emotional attachment for everyone is feeling good. Therefore, complaining he is doing something wrong, criticizing him, calling him stupid or his tastes and preferences, interrogating him, or controlling him in some way is simply going to cause him to shut down...
To find out how to communicate without making him feel demeaned or attacked, enroll in my online dating/relationship classes... you can be anywhere in the world to attend.
A man’s priority
A man’s most important accomplishment in life is NOT a relationship...say wha? Yes...it is his career, job, or fulfillment of some ambition. Only after he achieves such things will he say his marriage is the most important accomplishment in his life. Or his children.Believe me Oooo.
Because when you take away his career, his job, his salary... he will be the most miserable man you’ve ever seen and withdraw from his relationships. More unhappy than had he lost his marriage and kept his career.Sounds crazy! Ask any man he will tell more about this:-)
So even if a man SAYS his relationship or marriage is the most important thing (most men say that publicly), how he would typically react to job loss or financial loss proves it’s not always true.
It all makes perfect sense!
That's a guy you are so much in love with may not be as relentlessly pursuing you and making you official...Until he does get that job, get that raise or some other goal in mind, that will be his biggest focus and concern. Truth be told: Getting a girlfriend and keeping a girlfriend, while important, will not be THE MOST IMPORTANT endeavor. So take a chill pill and be patient with him.
That is why when dating or a relationship becomes problematic for a man, it seems he is able to let it go. It seems he can move on. He might have difficulty doing so because he is still emotionally attached, but because by nature, he feels he has yet to accomplish the most important thing in his life, he is not compelled to invest in a relationship as much as a woman might want him to.
A man has to actualize himself
Yes, he does. And you don’t want him not to. He needs to find himself. Know who he is and go after what he wants in life. Without doing this, he is lost, unhappy, emasculated, unempowered, and can’t pursue a woman and maintain a relationship.
And this makes sense when you think about it. Most women (at least those who have some measure of self-esteem and aren’t desperate) they don’t want to date a guy who sits around the house all day and can’t keep a job or who isn't looking for a job.So, when a man is being a man, he is being who you want him to be. Don’t fight it. You won’t win this one. Now this doesn’t mean a guy won’t pursue you until after he has met his first priority. It just means he won’t be treating the relationship the same way you do, be as worried about it, and be as attentive to the details...
Don’t fight what you can’t change. Work with it. Find ways to navigate around the whole thing that benefit YOU.
Remember, LOVE IS NOT ENOUGH. No amount of accommodating niceness from you is going to make a guy fall in love and make you exclusively his. In fact, the more you want him, the less he wants you... Know the limits to girl power. You can't force a guy to fall in love...but it can surly happen naturally.
Comments/Classes: kayrose.academy@gmail.com
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